AOC Has A Secret Drug Problem

Democrat Senator Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is battling a serious problem with drugs, according to one of her closest friends. Joe Barron, who has been dating her cousin Linda for nearly 2 months, says AOC has some serious issues:

“She isn’t some wide-eyed go-getter like some people think. She’s like that because of her many addictions to dangerous substances.”

According to other reports from sources that may or may not have a connection to the Senator or have any idea if their stories are true or not, AOC’s issues go way beyond the typical “drugs” people are normally concerned about. They say she doesn’t mess with the traditional things like cocaine and meth. She prefers harder drugs that are difficult to find, like bloogies and vaporized essential oils:

“The bloogies keep her up for days on end and then she vapes peppermint and lavender, even though they can kill some household pets. Her shameless actions won’t sit well with her constituents once they find out she cares more about being high than providing a safe environment for her shnoodle. He’s a rare cross between a shnauzer and a poodle and his name is Gus. Maybe it’s time to remind her that Gus has just as much right to live as she does.”

AOC’s office has refused our requests for comment, insisting that she has never touched a bloogie and that her dog is a pug named Louie. More lies from the left. What did you expect?

The Democrats are protecting her, claiming that her bloogie use was confined to college and that she only inhaled when partying with Bill Clinton. Looks like he’s a liar, too. It’s time to vote monsters like him out of office forever.

Nancy Pelosi, who has a serious problem with alcohol, has said that she supports AOC’s right to bloogie it up while not at work and that vaporizing lavender is her constitutional right. Yet another liberal nutjob protecting her own.

When will this madness end?

About Flagg Eagleton 16 Articles
Flagg Eagleton is the son of an American potato farmer and a patriot. After spending 4 years in the Navy and 7 on welfare picking himself up by the bootstraps, Flagg finally got his HVAC certificate and is hard at work keeping the mobile homes of Tallahassee at a comfy 83 degrees.

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