Grand Jury to Indict Tlaib for Inciting Violence

Congresswoman Rashida Tlaib (D-MI) infamously once said ‘We’re gonna impeach‘ the duly elected President of the United States.  Only she didn’t use those words.  She said the magic words that made my meemaw faint and our page’s top fans like Billy Graham and Oral Roberts squirm.  And that’s really bad because they’re dead.

And that was what she did in only her second day in office.

Several of her contemporaries took her message to heart and impeached President Trump, where he was totally exonerated in the very fair Senate trial with hundreds of hours of witness testimony.  Since the impeachment failure, Tlaib has ratcheted up the rhetoric instead of taking her loss as an adult.

Attorney General William Barr has seen enough and called in a grand jury investigation where it is expected that they will indict the Congresswoman on the charge of inciting violence by a sitting President.

Justice League spokesperson Joe Barron explained:

“As we know, all branches of government run through the President.  When she started talking about impeachment, he became very angry.  He started breaking things and threw a complete temper tantrum.

Witnesses to this Presidential tantrum had to leave the room that the President was in for fear of being injured.  We’re prosecuting the Congresswoman solely on the basis of the President losing his temper violently.

Had she not said what she did, this would have never happened.  Plus we have it on the surveillance cameras.  Open and shut.  Once she’s convicted, she’ll be kicked out of Congress immediately.”

Upon word of this headline reaching the pages, comments like “Send her back to where she came from!” and “Trump 2020!” were up nearly immediately because reading past headlines is hard for people who need to be told what to think.

Still, we can’t get past the technicality that Tlaib did cause someone to be violent, even though it was someone with the emotional maturity of a two-year-old, which may be enough to convict in today’s banana republic styled justice system.

About Pete Strocker 26 Articles
Pete Strocker (1821-1907, reborn in 1974) was good friends with Frederick Douglass before he left to form the first actual space force. With nothing but a Sith Lord and hundreds of stormtroopers and guys wearing red shirts, he ascended to the rank of Captain in Starfleet in 9 years, commanding 3 Star Destroyers until he wisecracked the Sith Lord and was killed by way of Force Lightning. Pete was reborn in 1974 when someone designing Pong hit the reset button. He has learned to not mess with Sith Lords and has instead turned to hard hitting journalism in the America’s Last Line of Defense Network.

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