As the youngest member of Congress, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez often lets her mouth run before her brain has fully engaged. A career bartender just a few years ago, she’s blurted out a wide selection of zingers, earning her the nickname “Loopy Alexandria” from impeached President Donald Trump and his flea circus of supporters.
During the most recent session of debate on a new bill designed to increase funding for anti-bullying measures championed by first lady Melania Trump as part of her vaguely illiterately-named “Be Best” initiative, Republican representatives played a pre-recorded message from the Slovenian prostitute. As a broken and rambling plea for “money what will for make childrens more filled with happy in life and in important schools”, Cortez interlaced her fingers contemplatively and quipped into her microphone a very insulting critique of Mrs. Trump’s intelligence.
“I laugh every time that refugee from a Bullwinkle cartoon tries to speak. It’s like watching Yakov Smirnov try to order Chinese food in French. For God’s sake, they keep saying the woman knows six languages, you’d think she’d trade in the BeetSoup-ese for at least a little English. I mean, if that yammering borscht-bellied condom tester came into my bar with all that Putin blabber, I’d make a really fast phone call to Sean Connery to get him to come pick up his crew hooker from the Red October. Seriously, is her video finally over, or is our cable stuck on the Babushka network?”
A host of pundits, mainly from Fox and OAN fake news channels have leapt into the viral fray, calling the Socialist Senorita’s comments “disgraceful” and screaming for an official apology. Host Sean Hannity reiterated that Mrs. Trump knows six languages seventeen times in repetition, since it’s his only defense for why a brainless trophy wife from a foreign nation is now the first lady of the United States to a racist President who hates immigrants from foreign nations.
It is shameful what the Trumps have had to endure these last few years. Thank God her thin-skinned pussy-ego’ed husband wasn’t the target of the congresswoman’s ire. He’d be crying all over Twitter.